Holiday Gifts from MT

Yesterday I started my Christmas shopping. This may seem some what late to people but I've never been an early shopper. And I'm not trying to buy anything crazy like a nintendo wii or anything that a store could run out of so I'm generally ok shopping just two weeks before Christmas. And I'll even shop a week before when I attempt to finish my shopping next weekend. I had to get the majority out of the way this weekend though because the deadline to mail anything and have it arrive in time for x-mas is Wednesday the 15th. Anyways...I don't know about anyone else but coming up with gift ideas for people is not my strong suit. So I decided this year to take advantage of living in Montana. My gifts for people all have a Montana theme. Now I obviously can't say what I got for everyone but there's actually a lot of things that would fall under this theme. Huckleberries and Flathead cherries are two berries that are very prominent in the area and I've learned you can get just about anything with these flavors. Chocolate bars, taffy, coffee, tea, hot chocolate, jam, syrup, jelly beans, lemonade and more. There's also packaged meat for people who aren't from around here and don't normally hunt these animals and eat them you can give a gift of elk or bison sausage, jerky, and more.

Leaving the food realm there's a whole world of copper products. Butte is a mining town and it boomed because of copper so naturally you can get anything you want in copper. Pots and pans, watches, mugs, dishes, ornaments, vases and again...more. There's also several items that you can get with a moose, bear, or buffalo picture on it and boom...it's Montana themed! It's great. Something else I saw yesterday...moose slippers that make noise. I don't know what noise cause I didn't explore that but they look like moose feet or paws or whatever you call them on a moose. (I guess I haven't spent enough time here yet to bother to figure out the anatomical terms for these animals) There was also a really cute onesie for a baby that made me sad I don't know any babies. It had a picture of two ducks and a moose and read, "duck, duck, moose" Super cute and Montana themed! For the guys there were also some boxers features moose and bears. One had them all sitting with their backs turned holding fishing poles and it said, "Nothin butt fishin." Fishing is also big in Montana so that gift would be ultra Montana with the animals and the fishing. Obviously for someone who lives here they probably wouldn't be as entertained by these gifts as I am. I'm so entertained I bought myself something. A shot glass that says Montana and has a little black bear hanging off the side. I will also probably buy myself a stuffed moose before I leave this state. Let me know if you'd like one too.

Distracted Driving

Yesterday I completed my fourth round of driving too and from Bismark, ND. Google maps and map quest will tell you from my door to my boyfriends is just under 10 hours. I won't share how much time it takes me. But anyways I know several states and cities have banned texting while driving and during my drive to Bismarck on Thursday and my drive back to Butte yesterday I started thinking of things that are just way more distracting than texting. Don't get me wrong texting while driving is still not a stellar idea but there's some other un-stellar ideas out there that there's no way they could ever be banned because it would be ridiculous. Well when I got back to work today one of my story assignments ironically was to do a preview story on an item going before the local Judiciary Committee tomorrow night, A proposed ban on all handheld electronic devices while driving. Now, whatever happens, happens. I'm cool with getting blue tooth but still thought I'd share my ridiculous list of other distracted driving activities that came up solely from my recent 18ish hours spent in my Rav4.

1. Blowing your nose and driving. I've been fighting a cold for over a week now (I'm scared of taking sick days) so of course I had this cold while driving across the Treasure state and inevitably had to blow my nose. Gross I know but hear me out. This takes two hands. If you can do this with one hand congrats but I discovered that I cannot. And I don't know how to drive with my knees so I was trying to steer with my elbows while clearing the mucus from my nose. Not safe.
2. Trying to retrieve a GPS that has fallen off its window mount thing. Also not safe. This requires some feeling around below your seat with hands and feet but you can't just let it sit there because you haven't hit the mute button yet and that voice is soooo annoying. No way can you continue to listen to that for hours.
3. Trying to find a song you want to listen to on your ipod. Texting I can do without looking. This not so much. I need to see what artist or song my ipod currently has selected. I've done this long drive a few times now and I get sick of listening to the same stuff I've got to mix it up. And ipods can hold some random stuff so if you just randomly hit buttons you end up with Britney Spears' first album "Baby one more time"
4. Trying to open a bottle with a twist top. Again, I'm sure some people can do this one handed but I just don't work out my hands ever. My technique is to position the bottle between my legs to hold it and twist off with a hand that way I don't need my other hand to hold the bottle and it can do its job on the steering wheel.
5. Taking pictures. Of course not safe but North Dakota if you are going to put massive structures along your highways like the world's largest cow you are just asking for people to take pictures while driving. How can you pass up such a photo op?
6. Buffalo. Ok this is not an activity but living in Montana for a year AND visiting Yellowstone National Park I had yet to see a Buffalo. Then driving through North Dakota yesterday I'm zipping along at speeds that are not legal on the east coast and I see a strange animal on the side of the road. Immediately my head whips around because I'm thinking "OMG that was a buffalo!" Clearly the buffalo had my attention and not the road. Then I start feverishly looking for more because obviously I need a picture of a buffalo. Sadly, I did not see anymore. Unless you've seen a million buffalo in your life how can you seriously just casually drive past one and not be distracted?
7. Social Media. With these smart phones you can check your twitter and facebook all you want. And what else am I supposed to do on a super long drive with hours of no radio and an ipod so old it dies after 20 minutes and can hold about 30 songs so I'm obviously sick of those. Especially when I do find some AM station that is pumping out Canadian news over the radio and the wiki leaks story hooks me in. Suddenly I need to get on my twitter and CNN.com to get more of the scoop.
8. Listening to stupid people on talk radio. Yes, I can keep both hands on the steering wheel and my eyes on the road. But sometimes someone is so stupid that you just throw your hands up in a "WHAT?!" Seriously, who buys a stainless steel necklace for $150 on black Friday. How on Earth did you think that was a good idea. And mom of the 15 year old who did that, WHY does your daughter have a credit card that is linked to your bank account?????
9. Getting a craving. I was desperately hoping to pass a Taco John's. Yes, east coasters that is really the name of a fast food Mexican place out here. And no, I was not craving Mexican as my boyfriend thought when I first told him. I wanted some tater tots. Now you're confused right. Well at Taco John's instead of giving you a side of tortilla chips or even doritos like Taco Bell commercials claim they do you get a side of potato ole's. This are tater tots that Taco John's has tried to make sound Mexican by adding the word "ole" after potato. Pretty hilarious. Anyways I was not passing any signs that told me there was a Taco John's nearby and I was pretty disappointed. I considered whipping out the Blackberry and doing a google search for the nearest one. However, I did not do this activity but I highly thought about it and that would definitely be distracted driving. Looking back I probably should have because what I ended up eating was a poor decision.
10. Which brings me to my next distracted driving item. Chicken Nuggets. I have three towns I always stop in on this long drive to get gas and use the little girls room. So at my next stop there was no Taco John's all there is is the gas station and a McDonalds. At the time I decided what the heck I haven't had it in a while and I'm hungry. I chose Chicken Nuggets for nostalgia reasons. I used to love these things as a child. With sweet and sour sauce is how I always ate them. And hey they would come with fries. So although I wouldn't get my potato ole's I would get some potato. First off, I know find chicken nuggets gross. What was little Melanie thinking? But anyways eating them is not a good idea while driving. I had my dipping sauce in one hand and nugget in the other and about a pinky finger on the steering wheel. Not ok at all but you can't make a law banning nugget eating and driving. I guess you could but it sounds ridiculous and Mcdonalds would probably do all it could to stop it, and win. While this is dangerous, it is also messy. Number 11...
11. Opening your water bottle to pour water onto a napkin to wipe sticky sweet and sour sauce off your steering wheel. You could insert any sticky substance here and it would be the same. Because you can't just wipe it off with a napkin, it would still be sticky. You've got to get the water involved.

I think the remainder of my drive after that was pretty free of strange distracted driving occurrences. But of course there are a ton more out there. Feel free to share. And to my parents just take a deep breath. I got home safely despite those Mcnuggets best efforts.